I wanted to let EVERYONE know how appreciative I have been over the last few months with the wonder gifts you have been sending. The ensure (wow a whole case!) has been good as long as I remember if I decide to have a second one it should be chilled other wise it tastes like warm pudding (which is still OK), but much better when cold. Of course even though it is given to me cold, by the time I drink it, it's gotten warm.
The gifts are great as well, but I'm down to sponge baths so the tub goodies don't dissolve too well (hee-hee).
Visits are OK a couple of days after infusions, but tire me out after around half hour. If I can get get the darn pain under control I'm still doing OK. Mentally not too bad. Computer, when I can get myself stimulated enough (get you mind away from there -- hee hee) seems to keep me doing OK for a while).
Love ya all
As you can see, I'm slowing down little by little.
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Butt kicking
Still here. New pain, getting worse, dialing in on meds to quell them down. Otherwise feeling okay. Starting to work on new computer install directions. Want to get them done this week, need kick in the butt for attitude adjustment, ready to let go, but not ready .. too much to do but guess gotta do whatcha gotta do first, so must hang on on.
Having lots of trouble getting up out of my chair so Jim went into town and bought some decorative blocks to put it up on. He wanted a 'little bit' taller but they were out of stock so he got these. Haven't tried getting up off the chair yet but getting in was much easier.
Excuse the down attitude, but beginning the 'butt kicking".
Love to all
Having lots of trouble getting up out of my chair so Jim went into town and bought some decorative blocks to put it up on. He wanted a 'little bit' taller but they were out of stock so he got these. Haven't tried getting up off the chair yet but getting in was much easier.
Excuse the down attitude, but beginning the 'butt kicking".
Love to all
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Correction
Meant to say "TOTAL" of three units. ONE of platelets, and TWO of the blood. Not infer that it was a total of 5 mean it was 3 platelets and 2 blood. Never much good at math ;)
Monday, February 16, 2009
Just a little update
Just a little update.
Had transfusion of the "3" platelets, 2 units blood. Doing okay. Little blocked on left side but okay. All signed up with Hospice. Nice, helpful group of people. Totally bent on keeping you comfortable during you ending days. Don't know how many but we'll try to get as many good ones as we can. Doing some hours at home so keeping up with work, friends, co workers. Sometimes a little tiring, but nice to say good bye.One was perfect. Along the lines of "Just wanted to say I love you and enjoyed knowing you all these years".
The family (Mark, Gina, Ava) are coming up for a short visit in a week or so. Looking forward to seeing them. Don't know how long I'll have the energy, since this is all dependent upon the blood count. It sounds as though when the blood transfusion doesn't work any more (no energy or response), then it's just a matter of slipping away. (getting more tired until I just fall asleep and not wake up due to the low blood count. The oxygen level is about as high as it can get (mid-100), but the 'number' of cells decreases, bleeding due to low platelets, etc. Anyway, they will keep me as pain free as possible.
Jim is such a sweetie. Doing everything he can to help to keep me comfortable and putting up with all the malarkey I give him. We're trying a synthetic med so Jim doesn't have to get up in the middle of the night to give me another dose (it lasts 12 hours).
Nurse Katie will be coming for a blood draw and check up on the new medication reaction on Wednesday. I'll also have the home aide Julie stop by around 11am. Then later that afternoon/evening I'll find out results (pretty sure I'll have to do a transfusion) and go in Thurs or Fri for the blood transfusion. As long as everything keeps me going until after visiting with the kids I'll be content.
You'll get a kick out of this ... I keep trying to answer alarm clock (small travel one) for my cell phone, and the TV remote for the hands free phone.
Love to all
Had transfusion of the "3" platelets, 2 units blood. Doing okay. Little blocked on left side but okay. All signed up with Hospice. Nice, helpful group of people. Totally bent on keeping you comfortable during you ending days. Don't know how many but we'll try to get as many good ones as we can. Doing some hours at home so keeping up with work, friends, co workers. Sometimes a little tiring, but nice to say good bye.One was perfect. Along the lines of "Just wanted to say I love you and enjoyed knowing you all these years".
The family (Mark, Gina, Ava) are coming up for a short visit in a week or so. Looking forward to seeing them. Don't know how long I'll have the energy, since this is all dependent upon the blood count. It sounds as though when the blood transfusion doesn't work any more (no energy or response), then it's just a matter of slipping away. (getting more tired until I just fall asleep and not wake up due to the low blood count. The oxygen level is about as high as it can get (mid-100), but the 'number' of cells decreases, bleeding due to low platelets, etc. Anyway, they will keep me as pain free as possible.
Jim is such a sweetie. Doing everything he can to help to keep me comfortable and putting up with all the malarkey I give him. We're trying a synthetic med so Jim doesn't have to get up in the middle of the night to give me another dose (it lasts 12 hours).
Nurse Katie will be coming for a blood draw and check up on the new medication reaction on Wednesday. I'll also have the home aide Julie stop by around 11am. Then later that afternoon/evening I'll find out results (pretty sure I'll have to do a transfusion) and go in Thurs or Fri for the blood transfusion. As long as everything keeps me going until after visiting with the kids I'll be content.
You'll get a kick out of this ... I keep trying to answer alarm clock (small travel one) for my cell phone, and the TV remote for the hands free phone.
Love to all
Friday, February 6, 2009
That's all folks
Well, don't think this is the final entry, but got bad news Thursday. Pet scan showed a lot of cancer still there and since I haven't responded to the previous treatment, there isn't anything anyone can do now except keeping me out of pain. I'm quite the wimp when it comes to pain. Pain=horrible attitude first thing to show up. Kinda said goodbye to doctor [think I pulled on his heart strings a little].
Did the living will thing. DNR, no feeding tube, breathing tube, etc. Only thing that he would have done different was no blood products, but the red blood transfusions seem to perk me up when they are really low. So I went with blood products okay. I also chose no IV antibiotics, fluids. Kinda worried about that later, but advanced oncology nurse said the fluids were more of life 'support' rather than I'm dehydrated and need some saline. Also said that things can always be change, if needed.
Had 2 units of blood and attitude was much better today. In fact when I got up this morning felt much better. Still a little tired (low count), but attitude much better. Decided to do a little computer work rather than take a nap. Napping seems to take a little more out of me.
Got signed up with Hospice and I think there is a lot of help there. Found out and am set up for them to come out and do blood draw for tests so I don't have to come in to CDA and then either wait or come back later to get treatment if needed. They will even help with bathing and tons other needs. Heard lot's of good stuff about them. Bit depressing thinking about what's ahead, but enough of this for now.
Anyway, I'm always open for a cell phone call (not home phone), since I usually have that by me all the time. I may not be up to long chats, but 'yakkity yak' I'll try to talk back at least for a while.
I love you all very much and really appreciate all your love and prayers coming my way. Please keep them coming!
Love to all
Did the living will thing. DNR, no feeding tube, breathing tube, etc. Only thing that he would have done different was no blood products, but the red blood transfusions seem to perk me up when they are really low. So I went with blood products okay. I also chose no IV antibiotics, fluids. Kinda worried about that later, but advanced oncology nurse said the fluids were more of life 'support' rather than I'm dehydrated and need some saline. Also said that things can always be change, if needed.
Had 2 units of blood and attitude was much better today. In fact when I got up this morning felt much better. Still a little tired (low count), but attitude much better. Decided to do a little computer work rather than take a nap. Napping seems to take a little more out of me.
Got signed up with Hospice and I think there is a lot of help there. Found out and am set up for them to come out and do blood draw for tests so I don't have to come in to CDA and then either wait or come back later to get treatment if needed. They will even help with bathing and tons other needs. Heard lot's of good stuff about them. Bit depressing thinking about what's ahead, but enough of this for now.
Anyway, I'm always open for a cell phone call (not home phone), since I usually have that by me all the time. I may not be up to long chats, but 'yakkity yak' I'll try to talk back at least for a while.
I love you all very much and really appreciate all your love and prayers coming my way. Please keep them coming!
Love to all
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Ups and downs
Been having my ups and downs last couple of days. Have enough stuff so far loaded on my new computer, to be able to put in 6 hours last few days of January, 4 hours on Monday the 2nd, and probably at least 4 on Tues.
Days don't seem to be going 'too' bad, but nights are hard. With side/back pain it really drags you down. Hard to keep the attitude up, but I'm trying. Just trying to figure out how to 'get my ducks in a row' for library work so everything transfers smoothly into the appropriate hands. Yes, I know I must think 'temporarily', but even that is getting hard.
Pet Scan is set for 8am Thurs (be there by 7:30), then over to treatment center for lab work at 2 then down to doc for 2:30 for exam and some of the results. It's going to be a very long day of just sitting and waiting.
He's going to be gone again for 2 weeks, but should have all the necessary results by Friday to write up 'orders' for while he is gone. Doubt there will be any major chemo treatment until he gets back. Dr. Morish will be taking over for those couple of weeks so I'm figuring I'll be going in once a week for blood work and go from there. Hopefully I'll last that long (yeah ... kinda a downer day today).
Other than the pain (so far pills are doing okay), I really don't feel to bad. This is the first time in quite a while that I've been able to do library stuff from home. Kinda keeps the fog at bay.
Thanks for all those wonderful thoughts and prayers you all are sending. It really does help with the moral. Oh well .. gotta do whatcha gotta do I guess.
Love to all
Days don't seem to be going 'too' bad, but nights are hard. With side/back pain it really drags you down. Hard to keep the attitude up, but I'm trying. Just trying to figure out how to 'get my ducks in a row' for library work so everything transfers smoothly into the appropriate hands. Yes, I know I must think 'temporarily', but even that is getting hard.
Pet Scan is set for 8am Thurs (be there by 7:30), then over to treatment center for lab work at 2 then down to doc for 2:30 for exam and some of the results. It's going to be a very long day of just sitting and waiting.
He's going to be gone again for 2 weeks, but should have all the necessary results by Friday to write up 'orders' for while he is gone. Doubt there will be any major chemo treatment until he gets back. Dr. Morish will be taking over for those couple of weeks so I'm figuring I'll be going in once a week for blood work and go from there. Hopefully I'll last that long (yeah ... kinda a downer day today).
Other than the pain (so far pills are doing okay), I really don't feel to bad. This is the first time in quite a while that I've been able to do library stuff from home. Kinda keeps the fog at bay.
Thanks for all those wonderful thoughts and prayers you all are sending. It really does help with the moral. Oh well .. gotta do whatcha gotta do I guess.
Love to all
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